Learning Who I Was After Everything Changed

I was going through old photos this weekend and noticed the different hair styles I had during different chapters of my life. Short hair, long hair, curls, straight, news anchor hair, post-divorce hair, menopause-thinning hair.

If you’ve been around for a while, you’ve seen a few of those eras.

At the time, I never thought much about it, but looking back now, I can see how often my hair changed when my life was changing too. Whether it was a new job, new city, new relationship, a loss, or a  beginning.

After my divorce, one of the hardest parts was realizing that I didn’t know who I was without the identity I’d built my life around. Marriage, career, future plans… all of it had been so intertwined. 

When that unraveled, I had to slowly figure out who I was again. 

That process was quieter than I expected. It was less dramatic and more about small choices like what I wanted to wear, how I wanted to show up, and what I stopped explaining to people. 

Which brings me back to hair. I’ve been getting a ton of questions about it lately, and it made me realize how much it’s tied to confidence, especially in midlife. So I pulled together my current favorite hair tools and products that I swear by.

Anyway, that’s where my head has been as we head into this new week. If you’re in a season where you’re shedding an old version of yourself, I just want you to know that it’s allowed. You don’t owe anyone consistency when you’re growing.

Xo, Tamsen

P.S. I shared a very personal solo episode of The Tamsen Show this week about divorce, identity, and the idea of “closure.” If that chapter resonates with you (or someone you love), it’s there when you’re ready.