What I Finally Understand About the Relationships That Shaped Me

One of the biggest mistakes I've made in my past is thinking I was too smart and too confident to be tricked by a manipulative man.

I spent years interviewing people for a living, reading a room was my job. Yet looking back, I missed patterns that now feel obvious.

Unhealthy relationships rarely begin looking unhealthy.

They begin looking like someone who's incredibly invested in you.

In this week's episode of The Tamsen Show, I share what I finally understand about the relationships that shaped my life and the patterns they had in common.

In both relationships, I experienced:

• Love bombing disguised as romance, generosity and feeling chosen.
• A hot-and-cold cycle that kept pulling me back.
• Blame-shifting instead of genuine accountability.
• Constant self-doubt until I stopped trusting my own instincts.
• Small boundary violations that slowly became much bigger ones.

If you're reading this and quietly recognizing your own relationship in these words, I want you to hear me.

You're not weak or naive. You're certainly not the only smart, capable woman who's ever wondered, "How did I not see it?"

I've asked myself that same question (twice!) 

My hope is that this conversation helps you stop blaming yourself, start trusting your instincts again, and remember that the healthiest relationship you'll ever have is the one you build with yourself.

You can listen to the full episode of The 5 Signs You're Dating a Narcissist (I Missed Every One) here or watch it here.

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