What Divorce Attorneys Wish Women Knew Before Marriage and Prenups

When the topic of prenups comes up, people tend to tense up.

It feels awkward, unromantic, and like you are admitting something might go wrong.

Sue Moss doesn’t see it that way. When she joined me on The Tamsen Show, she explained that a prenuptial agreement isn’t about predicting failure, it’s about understanding each other before pressure and emotion cloud the picture. It brings hidden expectations to the surface, where they can actually be addressed.

She also notes that many couples marry later in life with established careers and assets. Without clear agreements, mismatched assumptions about “what’s ours” can quietly erode trust.

Importantly, Sue Moss states on The Tamsen Show that prenups are not about planning for failure, they are about defining rules while both people still want to be fair. That fairness becomes much harder once emotions are involved.

She also clarifies that postnuptial agreements exist and are legal in many states, including New York. These agreements allow couples to reset expectations after marriage, particularly after career changes, caregiving shifts, or inheritance.

Prenups do not dictate child custody or support as those rights belong to the child. Instead, they focus on financial realities, property distribution, spousal support, and what happens if one partner dies.

The deeper takeaway is not legal, it is relational. Couples who can talk honestly about money, work, children, and obligations before marriage are better equipped to navigate stress later.

If you want to learn more, listen to this episode of The Tamsen Show.